So often when somebody wants me to do something, my first reaction is ‘No’. I’d like to change this reactive resistance and say yes if it’s a reasonable request. Because very often I end up doing it anyway, especially when its family.
My first phone call y’day ended up with ‘why don’t you come for lunch tomorrow?’ And I said NO. Thinking it over, I thought I should have stayed open and said yes. So when the next phone call also ended up the same way, I said why not.
I think the person who invited me was as surprised as me when I said yes.
We say No to invitations for dinner/lunch because of a number of reasons
– we may be obliged to invite them back and feel we cant take the trouble ( I’ve heard this from a few people though its has never been my reason)
– the person inviting us may not really mean it
– it could mean too much trouble for them
Today, we did have some stilted conversation but after some time, it all got warmed up and they really did open up and felt happy to show us their house and pictures and what not. And I felt glad that I did take the trouble to visit because for most people, one of the things that gets straight to them is visiting their home. You are sending a message ‘yes you do matter to me’ and that is something we want.