When things are going right, then my mind and I coast along fine, happy with life. Suddenly, we come up against a blip, and then my mind is dashing around in turbulence; looking for something or someone to blame. Why me or rather, why poor me swims around.
I’ve been chasing a surveyor (for a couple of weeks) to come and mark our boundaries so we can build a retaining wall. Today, when I still couldn’t pin him down, suddenly there’s this voice in my head -‘Is this woman’s work? Why am I chasing this guy? Shouldn’t my husband be doing this..?‘
And suddenly there’s another voice in my head saying ‘ what sexist stuff! If you were employed and asked to get a surveyor, you would be doing this exactly.. without complaint. So get on with it.’
And I did. With good grace.
And, when the surveyor asked me to come back an hour later, I took a walk down a road I’ve never been before, found some woods, smelt the eucalyptus, chatted to a cow man, met an old teacher and enjoyed the hour.
So, when he told me after the hour to call him tomorrow, it was still fine.
But, something that moved me much more today is a post on Zen habits about getting on with your ideas – start – do something- put things out – stop looking for perfectionism, and stop adding ideas. Get going, basically.
So, I stopped fidgeting around with my father’s bday book and started the printing.