Do you really need me?

Functions  are about how you make people feel connected and involved , not about what you are doing or wearing or how well orchestrated the whole show is.

With Sindhu’s wedding coming up, my mind reels with no, not the organization but everyone’s ideas of what is right.

-Some people are natural event managers.. they plan to the last detail, like to do it their way, have lots of minions to do their bidding , the money to command  and total confidence. They are sure theirs is the Right Way and so are clear in what they want. They tolerate very little interference.

– Some people are open to suggestion.  They listen to the ideas of dearly beloved people which may be right or not. And get a little swayed each time.

I belong to the second category and have a lot of people from the first category in my life. All happy to get their mind into organizing Sindhu’s engagement. Of course, they all say, ‘its your choice ’ but we all know better.

Its mostly the women.  Women love weddings as an excuse of bustle and shopping and lists and menus and what not. Men in our family don’t get too involved. Or are asked to hush. This is our day.

Being an interstate wedding, we host the engagement is ours while they do the  wedding. So our family would like to bring out the rituals and lay them out with colour and grandeur as much as possible in one function.

The venue oscillates like the scales of justice in a Tamil movie with music crescendoing in the background between a nice, clean, precise  hotel and the messy, warm home of my father with all its indeterminate factors.

A sister living in Canada, not wanting to be left out,  wants me to rope in the help of her student who runs a restaurant in Chennai for help over the menu. Ask him for something different/unusual she says.

Another cousin wants me to use his friend, a restaurateur to deliver the food at home.

One sister is busy scouring out weavers for ‘new designs’.

Another is looking out for designs for the ‘aarathi’

A cousin is busy planning all the ‘thattus’ of goodies to be displayed.

Another locates a ‘blouse designer’ in an exhibition.

My Malayalam speaking friends are delighted to be roped in  to bridge the language barrier

The guest list is gently creeping up.

Too many people, too much of a good thing? I don’t think so really.


4 thoughts on “Do you really need me?

  1. Hi Kalyani,

    Thanks for setting up the RSS feed. Helps me to read your posts while at work!

    And, you know what? The corporate world is full of the same kind of people you describe here. Except that we have a third kind too. The kind that pretends to orchestrate everything, loudmouths everyone as a routine way of pretending to be busy and being in charge, but in reality does absolutely nothing. Funnily though. the corporations invariably fall for the illusion.

    I will take the quiet bystander who chips in with his share of work, helps out wherever he can and does not really bother about credit, any day. Real work is often by the people who wonder if they are needed anymore!

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